Hello Friends,
And welcome back on another journey toward a Steady Mind.
In full transparency, my greatest hindrances in life have come from constantly awaiting others to approve of my dreams before I decide to follow them. The deadliest poison to any dreamer is the nagging desire to be acknowledged by those you are surrounded by.
If you’re anything like me, you too have the habit of wanting a stamp of approval from others before you move forward in action and purpose. But, what happens when you find yourself in a season of building, pursuing and evolving all the while feeling unnoticed?
Navigating through seasons without validation or support can be exhausting, but here are some perspectives that you should tap into:
Optional, Not Mandatory
Having a community of people who notice and affirm your growth, dreams and purpose is motivational, but not mandatory. The approval of others was never a prerequisite to your success.
In fact, to believe that support and validation from others are mandatory for your achievement shows that you are subconsciously seeking their "permission" before you act or engage.
No human should ever have that type of control over you.
Compliments and affirmations such as "good job!" or "I like what you're doing" or even "you're inspiring" are great to hear and can motivate you to pursue your dreams, but they were never a requirement for you to achieve them.
Though going without validation may be a little harder, it is definitely not impossible - keep moving!
When the Cake is Baked, They'll Want a Slice
Tragically, most people often find their way (to you) when you've already succeeded or have momentum. The validation and affirmation that you seek may not come until you're closest to achievement. Granted, this is usually a time when you need it the least. But, why let that stop you?
What it shows is that people aren't constant; they usually come at a time that benefits them most.
People are rarely willing to be committed to your process but are most times always willing to be committed to your achievement.
On the other hand, you can't get others to commit to your goals before you do. What you don't find in others you must learn to find within yourself. What you don't receive from others you must learn to build on your own. If you wait for others to help you chase your dreams you risk having a late start or worse, never starting at all. This was never the principle, you start and allow them to catch up.
Keep "baking your cake" even if they don't bring any "ingredients."
The Harsh Truth...
Sometimes, we are not ready for the level of support and promotion that we think we deserve.
Everything in life has to go through a process called maturity. Humans, relationships, thoughts, emotions, business ideas - anything you can imagine must mature.
Your issue might not be a lack of validation, but the ability to discern the seasons of your life. Many times what we think is a lack of support or acknowledgment is actually protection during our stages of immaturity.
We need moments behind the scene to grow, fail, learn, regroup, and restructure in PRIVATE. Do not allow your growth to be stunted at the expense of the opinions of others or lack thereof.
The reality is, sometimes we aren't as "good" as we think we are, but we do have the ability to get there by focusing on our craft.
Keep Shaking the Room
Don't get me wrong, it is a fantastic feeling when people take the time to affirm and validate us. But, please note that even when you aren't acknowledged that doesn't mean you aren't noticed.
Though they aren't liking and sharing the posts on social media, they notice your potential, talents, abilities and strategy. The goal is not just to achieve, but to be a force to reckon with. Be so great at what you do and prepare yourself to succeed on such a major level that those who notice are forced to acknowledge and affirm.
Don't confuse your lack of affirmation for your lack of abilities. You don't have to wait for others to acknowledge your greatness for you to be great. Keep showing up and shaking the room. In a short while, their attention will be arrested by the power of success that you carry.
There is greatness within you. In fact, power to change the world. But, you can't wait for others to believe in you before you believe in yourself. Focus on you and your dream, and those who are God-ordained to help you bring it to reality will find their way.
Here's to a Steady Mind